The past month and half it seems that I have been in a state of life flow. Whether that is for better or worse is still left to be decided. I've always been that of a philosophy junkie, and spending many of my years in school avoiding the classes to read philosophy books.
Between Buddhism, Taoism, and even some principles of Judeo-Christian beliefs; they all fall into this line of thinking that you should be one with the flow. While the latter considers the flow to be God, the former are more ethereal. Finding the flow to be that of the universe itself, the manifestation of the living universe.
When you focus too much on the past or future, then it causes you to be misaligned with the way or flow. I have found myself to be in that state this year, as I felt too far behind on my plans, and that would cause a downward stress cycle. When I got to my birthday this year it really lead me down a path of just enjoying the moment while you have it.
We can't be stuck on the future.
Growing up I would be overthinking every little failure or mistake I had made in any scenario. It was a constant drain of energy, and I stayed up countless nights overthinking the past. Ironically that caused me to flip, and do the opposite.
I started pursuing self-development in my early adult life, and it made me want to plan out my future. I tried rigorous schedules, loose routines, and overall tried to plan out every second of my day.
If I failed to make a deadline it would set me back, and I would have to then waste more time reorganizing the future. A time that is not within my control mind you, and I have been doing exactly that ALL YEAR (2022 atm).
Through all of covid/quarantine, there has been this feeling of lagging behind. Perhaps everyone is feeling it across the board, but I have felt that I am almost 2 years behind my own mental schedule. However I lived life just as I would normally for the most part. Just spent more time at home, and focused more on interviews.
We must not be trapped in the past.
Even yesterday is history. This past week for me has been an extreme roller coaster of emotions, many of which I do not think I have experienced before. Those emotions spawned due to me either thinking about the upcoming future where in a week some big change is happening, or worse I would be spiraling on something that happened a day or week prior.
This downward fall in the hourglass that is our Four Pillars of life, it caused me to negatively compound. My physical exhaustion lead to mental decline, and at the exact same time I was emotionally in turmoil. All three threw me out of alignment on their own, and they all decided to happen all at once. There would have been no way in hell I could work on even JUST ONE of them, let alone all three over time, if I did not bring myself out of the past. Stopped thinking about the stressors that caused the anxiety I was feeling in that moment, and focus on breathing and being centered.
You just have to breathe, and realize that this too will soon pass.
Bring yourself forth into the current moment. Open your eyes.
Whenever that panic had set in I would get blinded to the world around me, and the breathing became faint. I anchored myself to my previous lessons in life:
One, that by focusing on staying calm I could control the situation, by controlling HOW I reacted to the event.
Two, when calm and proactive, there would be an opportunity for me to relax a little bit. Then a little bit again, and again. Over the time of about 10 minutes you can get yourself back on track with focus and breathing.
Three, these are some of the lessons I have learned from teaching breathing in swim lessons. How you react to the stimulation of not being able to breathe from the water. The same thing happens in this anxiety episode, where instead of being surrounded by water, your mind is being surrounded by intrusive thoughts, plagued emotions, and falsehoods that lead you down a dark path. By holding your breath for a moment with control, then releasing to proactively next breathe deeply in. It all falls into place into a breathing pattern, that can bring back to a normal pattern of life. At least for a bit.
Honestly the song that has gotten me the most philosophical feeling, and often is what I listen to when I am trying to get into a meditative state.
"One must stay wise in the present moment, learn to return to a state of calmness, ease the pain by letting go of attachment, and keep their head high by remembering who they are."
-Dustin Miller PolyInnovator
It's good, good, good to be alive, right about now! -Andy Grammer
"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.“ — Dr. Seuss (Source)
This is the second time lately I've used this as a section title in a blog post because it really hits home to me. Whether you know the quote by Seuss, Pooh, or from Buddhism; In any case the power of how you feel is up to you. Sure our bodies natural chemical reactions will cause us to feel something when we don't realize it yet. Sometimes for better, and others for worse.
However you decide to feel the way you want to. If you want to pull yourself out of a rut, listen to the opposite feeling emotion type of music. If you need to feel your sadness in order to process it, then listen to the lyrics the songs that make you have feels. It all comes together to deciding how you feel in the present moment.
Always remember to bring yourself back, and strive for a harmoniously balance of past, present, and future. That is WHO YOU ARE.