I've been experiencing the feeling of dread in the last couple years, and it has lead me to become a bit jaded. This dread is from the sense that I am not progressing. Sure, with PolyInnovator there has been a lot of progression, and hell even with my own self-development as well.
However in my career, love life, as well as my desire to move out of my hometown. All of which have been stuck.
I would tell my ol' water aerobics classes that I wanted to work on a cruise, and while I applied to a dozen roles; I've yet to hear back from Carnival or Royal Caribbean both.
Moving to another place
I didn't want to just simply state a city or even Country because I don't even know. I've even been reconsidering my choices recently, for better or worse.
My first choice is that of Austin Texas, as it is a techie place, with a ton of conferences. Not to mention a much better climate than where I live. However it seems to be on the drop trajectory, it is getting over saturated, and I might have missed my window.
Perhaps not, and perhaps I am simply overthinking it. I think that I'll have to for sure at least give it a shot for a year or something.
Why my thoughts have changed
Not only do I have more and more friends pop up in New York City, but they have been people I feel considerably close with at this point. Not to mention some of the reasons why I love other places also apply to NYC.
I am currently on a trip to Florida, for the first time since I was a teenager, and now that I am an adult I can see the patterns more clearly. The liveliness, and vibe of the Sunshine state is feeling more like home to me than my actual home. Not because I particularly like Florida, but that because it is bigger.
I was told literally by 2 to 3 people in the past month alone that I belong in a place bigger than me.
Bigger than my hometown city.
Larger than Life
Just like the Backstreet Boys song, this concept of living larger than life is something that is sometimes used in a negative way.
However I see it in a current view of that your reality is based on your environment mainly. My life, my reality, has been more or less sub par. My friends have been one of the few highlights of recent years, even if I don't straight up tell my friend group.
However in all other aspects beyond friends and family (even my family has been lacking in recent years), my life has been nothing but going downhill.
It isn't for a lack of trying, but perhaps a lack of direction. Some CEO's I've befriended said something similar, but it was usually in the lens of PolyInnovator. Of which I have a hard time taking critism for, since that is my baby, my brand.
My lifestyle is that of a minimalist hermit if you will, but I do go out. I do enjoy the company of others, and on occasion I'd like to enjoy a bit of a splurge on my loved ones.
I need to upgrade my career, my life, in order to move and live the life I want. The life I NEED.